Category: Politics
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Airlift to stem EU population collapse
BRUSSELS — In the wake of the crisis meeting of the European Union's Population Board, EU ministers have called on the United States to begin an emergency airlift of "population…
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Neutered Dictionary’s release postponed
CHAPEL HILL — The University of North Carolina Press announced today that the scheduled release of "The Roy Williams Dictionary of Neutered Synonyms: Inexplicit Interjections, Adjectives, Adverbs and Gerunds" has…
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I saw (or heard) it on the sidelines
MY WIFE AND I have really nice season tickets for the UNC women's home games. So good, sometimes we can't see the game. Like when the opposing coach stands up…
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Dean Smith to coach Obama’s team
CHAPEL HILL, N.C. — Hall of Fame basketball coach Dean E. Smith announced today that he is coming out of his decade-long retirement to coach basketball again. Smith will be…
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Losers — in the Losers’ Bracket
MY WIFE IS A LOSER. Or at least she is since she met me. (Which may explain why we have grocery bags full of tennis trophies in our basement, very…
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Satan goes out at the “top of his game”
DURHAM — Satan announced today that he is stepping down immediately as the primary force for evil in this world. No word has been given on any of his possible…
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Bad blood: A blue blood feud
I HATE TO OPEN OLD WOUNDS — but, hey, we are heading fast into basketball season — and I always was bad about picking at a scab. When two of…
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Price gouging for fun and profit
THE OTHER DAY, while perversely listening to Air America, conservative little me, I tried to think of something they and I could agree on. My thought: price gouging; now that's…
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PETA sues McCain and Obama campaigns
RICHMOND — In a rare display of non-partisanship during this highly partisan political season, People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals filed a petition today in United States District Court…
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Biofuelishness: A darker shade of green
SOMETIMES THE CURE is worse than the disease; sometimes the side effects are more deadly than the malady itself. I like the concept of renewable energy in general and converting…
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